30 November 2020
As the holiday season dances around the city, love is in the air. This year will definitely be different for many of us. Our holiday parties will be very intimate… maybe even missing a few faces. Bless you love bug. It is my prayer that you still find time to spend with your loved ones. May this be one of the merriest Christmas’ that you experience. I’ve been lingering around the topic of love. While the internet screams about Birkens and such; I wonder “Do we still date with intention anymore?”. I had a conversation with someone about “the one that got away”. I asked, “What does love look like to you?”. He responded, “Thinking about her all day. Not being able to take my hands off of her when I’m around. Making passionate love to her everyday. Spoiling her with everything that she wants.” For a minute, I began to feel sorry for my friend. “He has not experienced true love”, I thought to myself. But what does that mean? Love is you by Chrisette Michelle, rings in my ears: “What’s your definition of it? How’s it make you feel?” When I say that I am a lover, I mean it. It has nothing to do with my skills in the bedroom. I’m truly a LOVER. Love requires effort. You have to nurture it like a baby. Love is caring, complex, intimate, shows up when no one else does, and it heals all. I view it as an action that produces strong emotions. Love fights through the storm. Love is undeniably needed to survive on this Earth. Love is not secretive nor jealous. Love is limitless. I thank God for parents who showed my sister and I what true love means. I will forever show gratitude for them. True love is knowing a person's faults, and loving them even more for them. My dad always says: “You will never have to chase true love”. I believe that to be true. I have experienced different types of love in my dating life. I’m grateful for the many lessons and failures. I have taken a piece of each to create my perfect love. Everyone wants to know more about love. Some of us run from it. What does it look like when you’re falling in love? Falling in love is easy; staying in love is something you have to work at daily. Love is listening. When you really love someone, you challenge them to be better. Love is both forgiving and asking for forgiveness. Love is addressing problems and challenges, not avoiding them. If I cannot be my true self with you then what are we doing? There’s a level of vulnerability that comes with being your true self. It’s a beautiful thing to experience. So many of us have experienced a lack of love in some place of our lives over the years. If you do not address your childhood traumas, your romantic relationship will. That’s a story for another time! I will always make time for the love in my life. Being in love feels like I found an extension of myself that I did not know I had until he helped me discover there is more to me than I thought. Share your thoughts with me! What does love feel like to you? How do you nurture it? When do you feel most loved?